My Wrinkle in Time: HOW does time fly?


What Makes Time Fly?

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
a light-hearted introduction to So-Much-More about Time


For over a quarter of a century now, I have been fascinated with anything related to the topic of the awareness of the passage of time.

My secret fascination with the mechanics of time’s awareness began long before I first learned that I seem to be one who was born without that internal tic-tic-tock with which most people DO seem to have been equipped, part of the standard package.

I’ve been told I can’t get one now, even as an after-market upgrade.

I first began to wonder how anybody managed to
keep track of time when I was a very young child.

  • I had no idea there was such a thing as an inner
    time-sense until I was diagnosed with ADD.
  • I was 38 years old.

From the moment my mother first read me the story of Alice in Wonderland, I felt more of a kinship to the “I’m late, I’m late, I’m late!” White Rabbit than to Alice.  

I can’t recall a time before my mid-twenties when somebody wasn’t rushing me along for one reason or another.

Don’t get me wrong

I was a bright kid. I had no problem understanding the concept of the passage of time. I also noted without confusion that the grownups danced to the cadence of that passage.

Schedules had to be regular and recurring or feathers would fly.

  • Particular foods (like eggs and oatmeal) had to be eaten every morning, shortly after being awakened.
  • Spaghetti and chicken foods were always eaten at night, but never too close to bedtime.
  • And that green salad rule: no green salad early in the day.

That was predictable.  I figured it out all by myself before I was even in school.

After all, food-timing rules were important enough that the grown-ups invented a bunch of code-words for groups of foods that hung out together at certain times, so that everybody could cite the darned things: breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack.

Through my parent’s friends I learned of still more, like supper — and brunch!

Like I said, I was a bright kid.

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Variations on ADD-ADHD


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Whad’ya mean“Variations?”

FreeVector-Octopus-Doodle

GOOD question!

Here are just a few of the answers:

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Stages of Grief following Diagnosis


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Exploring the Stages of Grief following Diagnosis

(c) Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the Grief & Diagnosis Series – all rights reserved

It’s A Process

In the previous article, I introduced some of the predictable stages of grief that we cycle through on the way to a Positive Acceptance of a diagnosis.

I use the term “Positive Acceptance” to refer to the developmental stage where we are able to incorporate a vision of the future that can include our diagnosis without allowing it to define our vision for ourselves and our lives.

We have reached the stage of Positive Acceptance when we are able to embrace our potential for incorporating change as development, affirming that healing and growth can, has and will occur in expected and unexpected ways — and that new opportunities will arise for which we have been uniquely prepared by the process of getting to this stage.

Given the tendency in our community to hyperfocus on rumination, when we are presented with a strong stimulus that triggers the release of adrenalin we tend to agonize!  As I said in the introductory article,  “it is only when we become ‘stuck’ in one of the phases of post-diagnosis grief that most of us take the time to stop to wonder what is going on with us and why we can’t ‘just get on with it.’”

What IS Going On?

One of the “problems” with adrenaline release is that it activates our fight-flight-freeze response, with its attendant shut-down of the prefrontal cortex [PFC] centers essential for what are termed the Executive Function.

Many of us with “alphabet disorders” [ADD, EFD, TBI, ASD] seem to have what I call “hair-trigger startle responses.” As a consequence, we often seem to get stuck far more often than our non-ADD peers.

It is my experience that everyone gets stuck when PFC shutdown occurs, it just happens more often and more dramatically to those of us with deficits in the realms of the attentional spectrum.

That’s the good news as well as the bad news, by the way, but let’s explore some brain-basics before we expand on that idea — and before we explore each of the stages of post-diagnostic grief at the end of this article.  (Stay with me here – it will help things make more sense)

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HEADS UP ADD Coaches: ACO Conference 2013


ACO 2013 is ramping up – sign up soon to save

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

You Mean I’m NOT Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! author Peggy Ramundo and I will again be “presenting” together at the 6th Annual ADHD Coaches Organization [ACO] conference, at the beautiful Crowne Plaza Hotel in Atlanta one more time — facilitating, actually, a live-and-in-person Coaching Lab with practice, practice, practice (and no-make-wrong group feedback). 

And that’s only ONE good reason to be there!  

I want to repeat Dr. Charles Parker’s comment in his 2012 post-conference article on his Corepsychblog, “If you are an ADHD coach and haven’t yet connected with the ACO  . . .  now is the time to get on it and get cracking.”

Joyce Kubric, the 2013 conference chair (mentored by last year’s chair Judith Champion), has put together a conference team of amazingly generous individuals who are working like beavers to make this an experience like no other.

This year’s presenters have been chosen, and you can click over to the ACO website  to see what’s coming together in that regard.  (Along with, oh yeah, signing up to BE there).

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How Cheap, really, IS talk?


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TalkCheapJustDo

For sale at spreadshirt.com

Just DO It!?

©Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the Creativity Series – all rights reserved

——————————————————–
Talk is cheap. Words are plentiful.
Deeds are precious.
~
H Ross Perot

—————————————————

Get OVER Yourselves!

There are A LOT of reasons why that ubiquitous advice to “Just DO It” seldom really works, but they’re rarely considered when those “tough love” so-called motivators mount their high horses. 

It is a worse than lousy motivator unless it comes at exactly the right moment and for exactly the right reasons to exactly the right person.  

  • Impulsives won’t be helped by that kind of encouragement.
  • Individuals at a crossroad in their lives would benefit more from a bit of that cheap talk before they Just DO anything.
  • Teens, already too much under the influence of peer pressure, certainly don’t need that kind of message tossed out like a dare.

There are folks, I suppose, who need that little kick-in-the-butt flavor of encouragement, and rare times when almost all of us could probably use it.  Those particular words, however, are more likely to activate our resistance than inspire our action, especially those of us with a higher than average oppositional piece to our make-up.

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